A friend was indulging in a lil' high school anecdotal reverie the other day and offhandedly mentioned that his driver's-ed teacher also happened to be pulling double-duty as the co-ed sex-ed instructor. I was instantly amused as I stopped to consider the convergence of these two fear-based pedagogies. With the right approach you could conceivably kill two birds with one stone if you had the right amalgam of an educational film. Suggested titles include "Blood on the Hymen/Baby in the Carseat" or "Staying Between the Cones: Outercourse and You" or "Abstinence and the Art of Defensive Driving" or "Hang on St. Christopher: The Missionary Position as 10 and 2" or "Banana in the Tailpipe: The Other Guy is Gonna Rear-end You" or "Brake Lights Can Lie: The Dangers of Pulling Out."